IMDB Plot Synopsis: IMDB doesn't even have a synopsis of this, so I offer their keywords instead: Year In Title | Biblical Reference | Human Sacrifice | Anachronistic | Burned Alive.
- Regarding the IMDB keywords: anachronistic? Really? I’m shocked. SHOCKED. I expected historical accuracy from a Jack Black swords-and-sandals epic, I really did.
- There is a tragic curse that befalls my friends and me when we try to go to the movies together. We never, ever see anything good. The list of movies I’ve seen with at least one if not all three of them includes (but is not limited to): X-Men Origins: Wolverine, One Week, The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, Australia, Ghost Town, Factory Girl, Sunshine, The Host, etc. We do not have a history of seeing decent movies together and even though we all knew this was coming, we saw it anyway. WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OURSELVES, WHY.
- When Zed and Oh (seriously?) would find themselves in improbably escapable situations only to cut next to a scene where they were miraculously freed of danger and carrying on with their lives, I decided that they had actually died each time and that they weren’t playing the same characters the whole way through but instead were cyphers propelling along a larger allegory. In my mind, this was the only thing that made it okay because otherwise this is quite possibly the most poorly constructed movie I have ever had the misfortune of suffering through. I have come to realise, of course, that Cain and Abel’s lesser known, flatulent, sheepfucker brother is actually the metaphor that best represents the subtlety and intelligence of this movie.
- I’m not entirely sure why, but Hank Azaria played Abraham like a pirate. I find this an odd characterization given that they live in A FUCKING DESERT.
- I laughed at precisely two jokes. 1) When Abraham was describing Sodom as the most wretched hive of scum and villainy this side of Cana and in trying to agree with a measure of solemnity and solidarity, Zed said “Abdominal.” 2) When Cain was reading off Zed and Oh’s litany of crimes and he said “Leprosy… animal husbandry…” I have a weird love for animal husbandry jokes because of Gary Oldman’s lame attempt at flirtation using an aforementioned animal husbandry joke in The Scarlet Letter. Also, I’m sorry I just admitted to having seen The Scarlet Letter enough times to remember he even makes such a joke.
- If there is one metacritical moment in this movie, it’s when Michael Cera, imprisoned and chained upside down, PEES ON HIS OWN FACE. Nowhere else did I so strongly identify with a character in this movie because I, too, felt completely ashamed, horrifically degraded, and hideously embarrassed for having participated in this story. I don’t need cinematic urine in my eye, thanks.
- IMDB does not give me the option of rating this movie zero stars. I must protest.
Everything you have said stands true. I am so glad you wrote this, as it relieves me of the pain and suffering of returning to contemplate the wretched bastard that is this movie to put my grievances into words.
Love reading all your reviews.
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I had no idea this movie existed, and I’m now thinking that’s a good thing.
Cannot imagine what made the director think having an actor pee on his face would be a good idea. Yeuch. And also blurgh.
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I just don’t understand reading a script, finding out that happens to your character, and saying “Yup, this is a project I totally want to be associated with.”
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OMG i’m reading this and getting stares because I’m laughing so hard. I never saw this movie but I kept hearing about Year One jokes and that Olivia Wilde from House was in it. Poor Olivia Wilde. IN this horribleness.
And he really peed on his own face? Is that even legal? Poor Michael Cera. I heart him so, and he peed on his face. *sighs*
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