IMDB Plot Synopsis: A traveling theater company gives its audience much more than they were expecting.
- I don’t feel like a folded up mobile theatre is street legal for the roads of London. It’s also clearly bigger on the inside than it is on the outside, not unlike the Spice Girls’ bus.
- Christopher Plummer played Dr. Parnassus like a drunk Dumbledore. There was a lot that was rushed in the explanation of Parnassus’ personal longevity, his history as a monk, how he’s able to control (guide?) people’s imaginations, etc.
- Tom Waits’ presence makes me want to watch Dracula. I liked that he kept calling Dr. Parnassus “Parny”. His Satan doesn’t really seem that interested in having people burn for all eternity so much as he just seems to be looking for a friend. He frequently gives Parnassus new wagers when it looks like Parnassus is going to lose the current bet, so obviously he’s more interested in being BFF with Parnassus than he is with actually winning. Poor lonely Satan.
- The whole “many actors, one character” thing worked just fine, but if you’re going to see this movie for Johnny Depp or Jude Law, neither of them are in the film for that long. Colin Farrell gets the most screentime of the three.
- Speaking of which, Jude Law somehow resembled what Cameron Diaz would look like if she were a man in drag. I have no idea how else to describe this.
- I nodded off briefly and the next thing I knew, Percy was in blackface. I have no idea what the context was, but regardless it was still upsetting.
- I think I was expecting this to be a whole lot more fantasy than it was. A good portion of the film is set in modern London and I know that the contrasts here are important thematically, but it didn’t work for me.
- Also, the revelation that Tony is actually a fraudulent charity CEO who HARVESTS ORGANS FROM CHILDREN and SELLS THEM TO RICH ADULTS was completely out of left field and, really, kind of glossed over. It’s mentioned in a single line and then the mob that chases after him and ultimately kills him is doing so not because they actually know about the ORGAN HARVESTING (I reiterate, ORGAN HARVESTING in all caps) but because they witnessed him having a fistfight with a kid on stage. While it is definitely a proper reaction to be angry when adult is beating up a child, I still can’t get over the organ harvesting. One more, for good measure: ORGAN. HARVESTING.
- Andrew Garfield was pretty horrendous in Lions for Lambs — although in his defense, that movie was terrible — so I was pleasantly surprised that he was not awful in this.
- I was so thrilled that five seconds after Valentina has sex with Tony, she encounters the Devil and tells him that now that she’s a woman, she’s also a bitch and is doomed to hell for all eternity (to paraphrase). Um… no.
- Speaking of which, I loved how at the start she was like “I’m turning 16, the age of consent!” because clearly that could only mean that someone who was clearly too old for her would be having sex with her at some point in the movie and they wanted to make sure that we knew it wasn’t morally reprehensible because, you know, she’s of age.
- Ultimately, this feels like when you have a really fantastic dream but the awesomeness is lost completely upon re-telling it to someone else. I know somewhere in here there’s a mind-blowing movie, but that’s not what ended up on the screen.
- The closing credits were quite fabulous. I also liked that it read “A Film from Heath Ledger and Friends” at the end. Oh, Heath Ledger, it’s very sad that you’re dead.
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